We’ve all been in the position of having to choose new medical professionals. Maybe a favorite dentist retired, or a beloved general practitioner is moving their office. Perhaps we’re seeking a new physician for our aging parents or our children who are transitioning beyond pediatric care. If you’re like me, you might have moved half-way across the country and had to start rebuilding your care team from scratch.
For many people, the doctor-patient relationship is that of an authority figure and an underling. The doctor speaks, and the patient listens. That may be how some people like it. It’s not a model that works for me, however, and I suspect others might agree.
For me, it’s important that my doctor is my teammate, and that we are both working toward the same goal: keeping me as healthy as possible.
Changing the old-school model of doctor-patient interaction often means “doc shopping.” Now, I do not mean this in the way the news does. I am not talking about seeing multiple healthcare professionals for the same issue, which often comes hand-in-hand with drug seeking (a loaded issue on its own).
Rather, I mean taking the time to interview a prospective physician as if you were hiring them for a job. If you want a teammate, you need to know the person you’re trusting with your life (or aspects of it), sees you as a person rather than a condition. You also need to make sure your personalities mesh. For me, I need a doctor who understands sarcasm and humor and has their own sense of humor as well. Yes, some of my own medical conditions are serious, but that doesn’t mean we have to be somber all the time.
Here are some other key points I consider when starting when selecting a new physician to add to my care team:
- Accessibility:
I like doctors who understand that not everything requires an office visit. If I have a question that can be answered in five minutes or less, then my doctor has to be comfortable using the secure messaging feature that comes with whatever portal system they have. (I’m totally okay with them having a nurse or PA respond in these situations. - Communication:
If I’m getting a new medication or being recommended for a new treatment or procedure, I want to know why, what to expect, and how it will benefit me, and while I’m comfortable asking these things if they aren’t immediately addressed, I shouldn’t have to. I also expect to be told in advance if appointments are significantly behind the expected schedule. I left a dentist recently because I showed up for an appointment on time, and after three hours waiting in the chair, they still hadn’t done anything. A simple phone call telling me they were behind and asking if I wanted to delay or reschedule would have done wonders to maintain my relationship with them. Instead, I’m seeing a different dentist. - Flexibility:
I’m not a fan of throwing pills at problems, if something else will work, or may work. So, I want a doctor who is flexible enough to ensure that if a dietary or lifestyle change can be attempted before medication, we do that. I also want a doctor who will listen to and seriously consider any ideas I might have. No, I don’t have a medical degree, but I have lived in my body for nearly fifty-five years, and I know my likely response to things. - Transparency:
One of the things I love about living in the computer age is that everything is online. Right now, I receive my lab results directly from my preferred lab before my doctor has seen them, so I can see what’s going on. I would never consider working with a medical professional who didn’t both allow and encourage that kind of transparency. (To be fair, this has sometimes caused me some anxiety when a result has been other than expected, but my GP always reminds me to breathe, not panic, and remember to talk to her.) - Empathy:
I don’t require that my doctor always agree with me, but I do require that they exhibit some form of empathy. I want to know that even though they are being paid, they still care enough to form a relationship with me. I changed doctors about a year ago because after six months of seeing a doctor with a generally favorable reputation she still didn’t know my name. Unacceptable. - Patient Autonomy and Responsibility:
If all these requirements seem specific or picky, understand that they come with a side of autonomy and responsibility. The autonomy part comes in decision making: my doctor can recommend a medication or treatment but the decision to go forward has to be mine. The flip side of this, though, is that I’m responsible for doing my own research, for learning as much as I can about whatever condition I need to have addressed, and for following the guidelines I’m given to address it.
The reality is: doctors aren’t gods. They’re highly trained professionals who provide a service that patients pay for. Yes, insurance of some kind might do the bulk of the payment, but we pay for that insurance, one way or another. Choosing a doctor is a delicate process and finding one whom you trust is on your side makes a world of difference in medical care.
What about you? How do you approach medical care for yourself or those YOU care for?