Enter BreathWork with Anthony Metten. Anthony himself is an incredible human being. His background is diverse, and his impact both insightful and uplifting. As a Care Circle leader, he has lent his expertise and guidance to many caregivers, providing support in our monthly gatherings. When Anthony brought my attention to his new adventure: guiding Breathwork, you can believe he had my full attention.
Being human comes with many wonderful moments; it's also laced with mistakes. The time for forgiving yourself for not knowing what you didn't know is now.
When you're overwhelmed with grief, decisions - even seemingly mindless ones - are hard. As remote caregivers or people caring for other caregivers, sometimes the best thing we can do when trying to help - whether it's because of a loss, or just everyday overwhelm - is offer specific small choices.
My grandmother was not the first elderly person to benefit from having a pet, nor was she the last. Pet companionship is fantastic because you can talk to a dog or cat all day, and they don't care if a story is repeated, or even if you're talking to them. While it's true that most pet dogs recognize about the same number of words as the average human two-year-old, what they really respond to is the sound of the human voice.
On this Mother's Day, in addition to honoring your mothers and mother-figures, I encourage you to celebrate the mother within. You are at the center of not only others that you care for but yourself, too. You are doing the best that you can, and yes, you may falter at times. Don't keep going in those moments and at times of exhaustion. Instead, find ways to replenish yourself.
Have you ever had black days? Days when you wanted to see nobody and do nothing, even the things you like best? If this happens once in a while, you could call it sadness. But if it lasts for more than three or four days it is known as depression. Depression is not a weakness, but a medical malfunction that takes away your control, and there are two major types. One is triggered by specific events like a death in the family, loss of a job, an injury that affects your ability to function as you typically would.
It begins with the stripping away of all the holiday trappings, usually on the first day of the year, but sometimes the following weekend. Red and green are packed away to be replaced with calming pastels - tranquil blues and creams - punctuated with bursts of color (turquoise, lime green, orange) that are like visual bubbles of delight. They lack the audacity of Valentine reds, purple, and pink, and aren't quite as vivid as the colors of spring and summer, but they feel light and positive when compared to the muted light and bare trees outside.
Do you believe in magic? I do. The holiday and New Year seasons are lovely reminders of its importance; you can feel it in the air if you are still enough. Small acts of kindness, random gestures, or simple adventures can fill your heart and that of others with magic. Hope. Peace.
New Beginnings don’t happen all at once. They can be a soft accumulation of things that have been brewing for a long time. A New Beginning can be adjusting to the new role of a caregiver; a role that you might not have chosen, but it chose you.
In this second part we’ll look at the In-Between stage. For caregivers it is the space between what was and what will be. Suzanne Braun Levine calls this space the Fertile Void and describes it as, “the long, slow, deep breath -the gathering in of strength - that precedes a daring leap into the unknown.”
