Instantly I’m ten years old, sitting on the ancient beige chintz sofa in my grandparents’ den, racing with my grandfather to see which of us could answer first, while my grandmother made comments about which of us should know the answer. I didn’t know, then, that their daily viewing of this television show was part of my grandmother’s attempt to ensure that my grandfather’s brain remained stimulated and active.
Going to the beach, then, became something of an adventure. We had to pack extra clothing and hygiene products (we were all in California by then, and unlike New Jersey, the beaches there don’t all have restrooms and changing cabanas). Of course, we were all well trained in the art of changing behind towels held up by whoever was with you, but after my grandmother’s hip replacement, she needed a wheelchair, and that made things a bit more complicated.
There is nothing wrong with going to the beach or having a family picnic on Memorial Day. My grandfather, who died when I was twenty-one, often reminded us that he and his compatriots fought for our right to have those parties and picnics. However, it’s important to remember that this holiday has a somber element. We are meant to remember the military officers – fathers, mothers, aunts, uncles, grandparents, siblings – in our family. We are meant to honor their service. We are meant to tell their stories.
Memorial Day Musings Read More »
This Mother’s Day, take the extra time to let your Mom hear you from a heart space about special moments that mean so much to you.
Just as people who stutter are often encouraged to sing to help their speech flow more freely, singing or playing music makes memories flow and allows conversations to happen more easily. When an elderly relative or someone with cognitive impairment can’t remember or can’t find words to speak, playing music or singing together can help the memories flow. Singing a favorite “oldie” like Elvis’s “Love me Tender” might trigger memories of first loves while playing classical pieces might spark conversations about anything from weddings to concerts.
